The Devil Wears Patagonia

Author: Jordan Nassar

Work hard, play hard. That's what they say about us Middlebury students, right? While that may be astute, and kind of fun for the first year or so, I have a feeling that playing hard is not quite what all of us are looking for. You've heard it, you've probably even said it yourself - there's no such thing as romance here, just trashy weekend hookups with awkward dining hall repercussions. Ever wonder why that is? I offer a theory as to why, and a remedy.

It's Friday. Class, lunch, more class, a slow dinner with friends and a shower later. You're getting ready for whatever the night will offer. You look really cute, you're feeling good, you're having a cocktail with friends. Confidence, check. Saturday's not too different - and maybe you've made some social or sexual progress. So far, so good.

On Sunday you roll out of your bed in sweatpants, a sweatshirt, hair thrown up in a messy bun or under a baseball cap and not quite a smile on your face - it's back to the libraryÖ right? WRONG!

Okay fine, you are going back to the library, with your heavy bag and your heavy eyes, but here's the thing - we all spend a lot of time at the library. There are some people who I have only ever seen in the library. This goes for everyone - you see people you've never seen, and they see you. What would you like them to see? Your dress or nice jeans are on the floor of your room and there you are, staring at that guy or girl from that party the other night, and you're wearing MIDDLEBURY across your backside, and probably your frontside, too.

No, no. You want them to see you at your best. You know what you look best in and, more importantly, feel best in. Your best is not sweatpants. Sweatpants, and other such comfort-wear (we'll get to polar fleece later), are just that - comfortable. Hate to bust your bubble, but I'll be the one to say it - no one wants to look at comfortable. Let's not be lazy. This is your only life - don't live it in sweatpants.

The library, and campus in general (especially dining halls) are important social environments. Sure, you're there to work or eat or what have you, but at the same time, you're seeing new faces, talking to new people and maybe running into that person you wanted to run into. Keep this in mind next time you prepare for a day with the books. I know, those jeans are tight and restrictive, that shirt too thin for the AC and of course those (really cute) shoes hurt - but you can still sit in a comfy chair and you look good.

This, I believe, is an insightful offering regarding the conundrum that is hook-up culture. Maybe if you looked hot all the time, instead of just weekends, someone special would want to be seen with you. Or someone unexpected will notice you and start becoming that special someone. The possibilities are endless, the outfits limitless, the love everlasting.

So please, take heed. That, or stop boo-hooing about the alleged romance problem at Middlebury. Laziness and comfort are the problem. Or maybe that hottie from the bar just didn't recognize you in your pajamas. Whoops.