Author: Astri von Arbin Ahlander
Exams are rapidly approaching, meaning so are all-nighters at the library and, invariably, unflattering sweatsuits. Is it too much to ask to stay hot during the peak of stress? I think not. But just like you can't expect to take two-hour lunch breaks come mid-December, you also can't be expected to maintain your former style. As you begin scheduling in five-minute coffee breaks to see your friends - and reclaim your sanity - you also change your fashion habits to match the hype of the times. And so I offer up some high-stress, low-maintenance tips to keep it hot this exam season.
After three straight all-nighters, sweats are understandably a must. But, unless you have a matching velour track-suit (if you do, by all means, wear it!) the key to making comfort clothes work is the jigsaw puzzle approach. That is, fit the right pieces together to make a pleasing whole. If you wear sweatpants, make sure you wear something fitted up top. If you can't possibly make it through the 10-page paper without the comfort of your boyfriends sweatshirt, choose skinny jeans on the bottom. These are often made in super-stretchy materials, so there's no excuse for slipping on that oversized pair instead. Just make sure you're never caught in sweatpants and a sweatshirt at the same time. If you do encounter a fellow student outfitted in such a way, the only remedy is to discretely look away.
The second key to a successful comfort outfit is to accessorize. What was it Jackie O said? "It's all in the details." A hot pair of earrings doesn't take time to put on and, unless you choose from the Beyonce-sized variety, they're not uncomfortable. Stuff your books in a chic shoulder bag. Forego the flip-flops and sneakers in favor of a hot pair of boots. Who says sweatpants can't be tucked into furry-lined suedes? They'll keep your toes cozy, too. But perhaps the most important accessory for this chilly and stressful time is the hat. Whether knitted, fur-lined, cotton, wool or luxury cashmere, worn tucked over the ears, nonchalantly tweaked to the side or pulled down low over the eyes, well-chosen head gear not only hides your greasy, no-time-for-a-shower hair and stress-induced acne-ridden forehead - it also invariably adds a cute-and-cuddly look to any exam-taker. Which leads me to my next point: library love.
At first glance, it may seem as though there is no worse time to cultivate romance on campus than during exams. Think again. Exam period is the one time when you can be sure of where to find your crush: the library. And, just like winter darkness and seasonal depression bring people seeking warmth together, stress can also act as an erotic agent. Sex is a common physical response to emotional instability. I'm not saying it's a good thing, I'm just saying that's the way it is. Exams are an excellent time to meet new people to crush on. There's nothing like bonding over a broken printer, an empty stapler cartridge or shared wrath brought on by a loud cell-phone talker. Middlebury may be a haven of health, but come exams the percentage of smokers - beyond the staple internationals - skyrockets. And so, the smoking scene directly outside the library doors becomes a breeding ground for close encounters. The exam period is also a funny time because it is so un-synched. Some are swamped until the last day while others are finished almost before the panic has begun. Hence, no matter the threatening reminders from Public Safety to leave 24 hours after your last exam, there is always a slew of stragglers hanging around, ever-ready to party and relieve your stress with a comforting embrace.
To conclude, my sage advice for the upcoming exam period is to gear up with hot comfort clothes and brave the library with an open mind and an open heart.
Regally Blonde Episode V - Heating Up Exams
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