Rural Banter

Author: ERICA GOODMAN

Behold the power of mud.

I wonder if the football team would consider running a few spring practices at my house. Instead of hitting the weight room in the off-season, the Panther football squad should hire out their brawn to help those less fortunate who are...stuck in the mud.

You know the old saying - people in glass houses should not throw stones. Well, people who live on dirt roads should not attempt to drive their cars from March until Memorial Day. Nobody lives around here very long without getting some contraption stuck in the mud. You see, recently, my family, like many in Vermont, has found itself in a sticky situation. It's that time of the year when dirt roads and driveways, famished after spending months under ice and snow, open their hungry mouths to vulnerable vehicles. Our driveway has become the black hole of mud season, sucking in the tires of any moving objects that dare to enter. The ruts and divots created by numerous mud mishaps have even taken on the look of the Rocky Mountains in miniature.

Farmers must be especially careful when venturing into their fields to till the soil. When it comes to tractors, the bigger they are, the harder they are to un-stick, and an even larger piece of machinery is needed to pull it free (or I suppose more football pusher-outers are necessary).

But can't we make the most of the spring thaw? It seems to me that the brown muck deserves a bit more respect. In her battle versus the machine, Mother Nature is putting up quite a fight. Anything that can pull a tractor or a SUV off the road and keep it there deserves some admiration. Or perhaps it is mechanical natural selection - a survival of the fittest for automobiles.

Mud not only stops the progress of transportation, but possibly also that of time. Fancy spas claim that the natural goo hydrates the skin and reverses the signs of aging. Mud season also brings with it a unique rebirth of fashion. Rubber boots have made a strong comeback and for once I might be ahead of the trend - I have worn tall black or yellow galoshes to navigate the cow barn for as long as I can remember. (Of course, these shoes protect my toes from more than just mud - you can use your imagination). Now stores such as Neiman Marcus are dishing out waders in bright pastels and patterns, from baby animals to Burberry. I wonder how many farmers today are trying to look cute by sporting high-rubber boots with little yellow duckies.

Spring is a beautiful time of year - lambs bouncing through the fields, birds returning north, trees budding with new life. The snow is slowly disappearing and the Green Mountains are taking on their true form as the grass slowly comes to life. But as spring rain continues to slosh up the sidewalks, drivers beware. You just might get stuck in the mud.